With the recent discovery that Bryan Colangelo’s wife has been revealing team secrets, bashing players, and defending the size of his shirt collars (what is this world we live in) I started thinking about all of the other burner accounts that have to be out there from other stars, owners, and executives in sports, specifically the NFL. With all of the controversy the NFL involves itself in, and how it is a sport that is covered all year, there have to be people around the NFL that need to blow off some steam and defend themselves on the internet. Here are the 4 players and executives that I would assume have burner accounts.
We’ve all seen it on Twitter. The account TrumpFan123456 with an avi of a dude holding an assault rifle and an American flag arguing with people about how Colin Kaepernick is a terrible human being. That is Robert Kraft. Robert Kraft is much smarter than he looks considering he has been involved in scandal after scandal as the owner of the Patriots. Oh and also he is worth $4.17 billion so he can figure out how to run a Twitter account. He has also donated $1 million to Donald Trump, the President that is staunchly against kneeling during the National Anthem and is reportedly going to be one of the owners deposed in the Colin Kaepernick case. No thanks needed guys. I figured it out.
Does anyone actually believe he is a better quarterback than Carson Wentz? I mean seriously, anyone with a functioning brain can look at the two and easily come to the conclusion that they would much rather have one than the other. Not only that, but he is much too quiet as the franchise quarterback of “America’s Team.” With all of the pressure and scrutiny that he is under, he has got to be unleashing all of that pent-up energy somewhere. This year may be worse than others considering they have the worst receiving corps in the NFL and will make Prescott’s life a living hell.
I personally believe Baker Mayfield is going to be a really good quarterback in this league and am looking forward to watching him both on the field and on Hard Knocks in August. However, his personality screams burner accounts. Yes, more than one burner. He doesn’t use that burner to defend himself but to trash talk his opponents. Mayfield has heard every criticism about him and his size since he transferred to Oklahoma, even donning the slights on clothing like the “traitor” t-shirt he wore to mock Texas Tech fans. I wouldn’t put it past him to just be sitting back on Twitter and writing down every person that has said he won’t be good enough, just to unleash on them when he has a great game or season.
We all saw that rant. How glorious a rant it was. Have we ever wondered how Kelce knew of all of these criticisms though? Well, he hasn’t tweeted anything since November 5th of 2016. The only logical answer is with a burner account folks. Who really goes out of their way to listen to Mike Lombardi anyways? He had to have seen it come across his timeline during training camp last year and marked it down, eventually making it the best part of his Super Bowl speech.
These are the four figures from the NFL that I would bet my life savings have a burner account. I think the whole burner account fiasco in the NBA is quite hilarious. Even though it might cost my city a chance to get LeBron James since he was making jokes about it yesterday. I am looking forward to the next burner account scandal, and hopefully (for my clout) it is one of the four described above.